No Food Since Last Saturday and Going Strong

So, I have officially gotten through 5 complete days of ingesting nothing but water.

It's been relatively easy - don't get me wrong, I've had the desire to eat. But the desire to clean out my body has been stronger. And, I know I can eat again in the future. So I've been managing the short term desires with the long term goal with relative ease.

Recap of the Last 24 Hours
Yesterday morning I woke up really hungry and really wanted to eat. I am drinking my water one 20 oz bottle at a time. This is a mental game for me; it's easier for me to drink six little 20 oz bottles than it is to drink one big ol' gallon of water. I went to get one of my bottles, drank it down - I'm finding I'm really really dehydrated in the mornings, makes sense I haven't given any water to my body while I was sleeping but my body was still working. Anyway, I drank the water in a quick gulp. Hunger was gone. Just like that.

I always heard that whole thing about if you're hungry it's probably just thirst, but I never believed it. But it seems to be true. True or not, when you're used to eating food, eating something is way more fun than just drinking a glass of water.

I did some light stretching yesterday, but I didn't have any desire to exert myself any more than that. I didn't work yesterday, thankfully, because man I was S O O O O W E A K. I mean, like how little old ladies get all whispy voiced, "Can you get that for me. Wooh..." I was in slow motion.

What did I do? I got up, I puttered around the house. OH! Funny. I reorganized my medicine cabinet. I wanted to clean but didn't have much energy ... so. this was the most I could accomplish. It makes me even laugh. I have dishes to do and laundry to put away, but sorting the medicine cabinet ... that's done.

A co-worker had invited me to go shopping with her yesterday afternoon. I wasn't sure I was up for it when I accepted the invitation, and as the afternoon approached, it became pretty clear that shopping was the last thing I wanted to do that day. But, I thought, well, maybe it will be good for me to get out of the house. I called her at our agreed upon time of 2 pm. and asked if she still wanted to go. The gods were with me - she had forgotten she had another obligation that night, and it would be too tight to do both. I said that's fine. Danger averted!

But then I was left with just myself. I credit my having to work during these first days of this fast as being a blessing because I have had other things to occupy me instead of just going to get some food. However - now here I am. Alone. With two boxes of Golden Grahams and some chocolate chips and marshmallows that I was going to make S'mores treats with before I started this fast. My cupboards are chock full of food. Good God, I'm in a land mine field!

I drank more water. Water just instantly dissipates any feelings of hunger. It's really amazing. It's really boring, just water, but it is amazing.

I puttered around the apartment some more. Avoided doing dishes or putting my laundry away some more.

The friend I told about my fast, Mick, called at about this time. We talked for a while. I told him how the fast was going. He told me that he's gotta do the same, he's looking at gyms to join and getting back on his own health track, too. It was a good conversation. I told him how grateful I was that he's not like, "You're STARVING yourself! You'll become ANOREXIC! You're going to DIE!!!!!!!" He laughed and said, "Well, we've both got enough body fat that I know either one of us would be fine without food for a while without being in danger." He manages the dietary department of three hospitals. He's a moderately credible source.

At this point, you might be asking, "Aren't you going to check in with your doctor?" Excellent question. The answer: no. The reason: I think there's two fields of medicine out there, holistic and medicinal. I know those aren't the proper terms, but I think traditional medical doctors are just treating symptoms and aren't really getting people down into the root cause. Holistic medicine is about getting down to the root. Holistic pulls the root - it might take more time and more digging, but my experience has been that they get to the root and pull the sickness from there. And once the root is pulled - it's gone. Medicinal medicine gives you medicine to treat the symptoms, aleviate the pain, but it does not correct the cause. So to me, going to my doctor for guidance on this fast is like going to an accountant when I'm trying to figure out what to do next on a painting. I think there is a place for both, and I think there are people who feel they get more help medicinally and those who feel they get more help holistically. I am in the holistic camp. Just my preference, not saying it has to be yours.

On that note, I'll get into the continual physical changes shortly. But let me just wrap up the day. After my friend and I decided we were not going shopping, I decided I needed to get out of the house for a bit. So what did I do? Go shopping. I got home around 6. At about this time, my friend called and said she was done with her other obligation, did I want to go chat for a while at a coffe shop or something? I said sure. So, we did that. It was really nice.

A note about that: We get to the coffee shop. I get two bottles of water. She gets a salad. Quick side note on being around people eating: She does not know I am water fasting. She offers me some of her salad. I say, Oh, thank you, but I'm OK. And just like that, the conversation was over. People just don't care that much whether I eat or not. Which to me is refreshing. I think when I was growing up, I was told to eat and had to eat at that time whether I was hungry or not, or told to try this! and they would be offended if I didn't want to. So I just learned to eat to appease others. As an adult, friends want to go out to eat, and if they wanted fried food and I wanted a salad, I was mocked for being healthy. So, to appease them, I would eat the fried food. Let me be clear here: I am not blaming others for these things. I'm just realizing that people like hanging out with me because I am open to doing what they like to do. Let's suffice it to say that I am learning that I am the only one who will do for me what I need done for me. We're all in it for ourselves. I am just learning to honor what I need for my own self.

The coffee shop closed at 9. Came home, feeling pretty good on energy now. Cleaned out my fridge. It's totally empty right now except for some condiments on the door. Considered doing dishes and putting laundry away. Put in a movie instead. Fell asleep for the day.

Oh! One last thought. Before my friend called for going to the coffee shop, I sat for a while and just wanted to be still. I have read in those books to tune in to your body, it will tell you what it needs and wants. Sounds a little kooky, but hey, I'm up for anything. I calm my mind and tune in to my body, and ask how each organ and body part is feeling. This was pretty funny; I had the image of this very Queeny Gay Foreman talking to me and saying, "OK. Here's the deal. You needed this cleanse immensely! Your organs are sooooo glad you finally did this." I won't get to into the detal of this, but each organ had it's own voice and personality, and each reported on how they were doing and how long they wanted me to continue the fast. Think what you will - overactive imagination, hallucination from lack of food ... I'll buy either of those. It was an interesting experience. All I can legitimately confirm is that physically, I feel immensely better than I did before starting this fast.

Physical Changes
-Yesterday when I was showering, I am washing my hair, and I suddenly became very aware of my skull. I have never really been aware of my skull; as in, the bones that comprise my skull. I thought, was there fat there before that was keeping me from feeling this? It was a strange experience - I became more aware of all my bones. They've been buried for a long time.
- Still have blemishes on the face that are still taking their time healing. My cheeks look more flush and rosy, and my skin would be looking really good if it weren't for these few last spots. Still have blackheads on my nose. That's more from outside dirt than inside cleansing, though.
- Yesterday I touched on having pussy postules on my nose as part of my nostril yeast camps. I have a scab on my nose residual from one of those that is; again, slow to heal. The yeast inside my nose seems to be almost gone. The front corners are still tender. There is a wound inside my right nostrtil, not sure what this has to do with the yeast, but it's still working on healing. My left nostril seems pretty clear. My right nostril is the one with the wound, and still has some yeast hangers on. But it's getting clearer.
- I am officially down 10 pounds. I truly did not expect this rapid weight loss. I've fasted before, and didn't lose anything. I take this as a sign that my body is throwing the excess out!
- And speaking of throwing things out - I POOPED yesterday! Isn't that great? Oh, lord. It wasn't much, and it wasn't the huge mucoid rope that is the holy grail of fasting shits. But hey, there's things being done in there at least.
-Yesterday afternoon, after my shower/bone experience, I was getting dressed and sat down for a minute. I suddenly felt that my chest felt very open and light; like a physical manifisation of having gotten something off my chest. I'm not sure what it was that got off my chest - could be just excess fat, could be that that tricky heart chakra of mine finally opened up. Whatever caused it, my chest felt free and light.
-I haven't talked about emotions yet. Every fast book or article I've read said that as your body eliminates toxins and fats, emotions come out too. I haven't had any emotional outbursts in the way they make it sound I would. I've been expecting these dramatic, jagged crying weeping sessions. Or lashing out at people, in a moment of feeling starved for food and/or love. I've had neither. In fact, I've felt on a very even keel emotionally. Much more stable than before. I've had a few feelings of anger, but nothing any more than I would occassionally feel before. I've had a couple moments of sadness, but I expressed them right away, so they were taken care of. I don't know.
- Yesterday, I felt mentally foggy. I think I was just so damned tired.
- My legs have lost their cellulite. They are still carrying extra pounds; but they are smooth and young looking. The bumps and lumps I had five days ago are gone. I noticed they looked better about two days ago. Yesterday I looked at them and thought, those are the legs of a much younger woman than I. There's some weight to get rid of on them, but: Hallelujah!
-I looked at my body as a whole. I am seeing my waist again. I can see each day where the fat came off. It's interesting to see that the body has a process; when I gained the weight, I could see where it was deposited. Those same deposits are coming off in the same order.
-The bottom of my left foot. The big I'm-pretty-certain-it-was-another-candida-camp-on-the -pad-of -my -left -foot is pretty much healed up. There is a little bit left on the pinky toe, but overall, healing is that foots general direction.

That's all I have to report on physical changes. What I'm finding the most interesting on the changes is that the books say, yes, you should fast anywhere from one day a week to a few days every month to on and on and on with theories and postulations. They say you should do this to give your body a break from constantly having to process and digest your food.

I always dismissed those concepts. After all, what they hell else would my body do if it wasn't digesting food? Sorry, but isn't that what it's supposed to be doing? I eat. It digests what I eat. I poop and pee out the leftovers. We do it again. I'm finding out that filling my body food it doesn't need is like a manager giving her employees a ton of busy work. It might look like like everything is operating just fine, but it doesn't allow the employees any time to act on the things that could change and benefit the company as a whole.

The Next 24 Hours
So, I'm just gonna say it. Water fasting is pretty boring. I mean, I get a hunger pang, I drink water, it's gone. I tell people no thank you to the food they offer me, they say ok. Whoopdeedoo. While the physical changes I'm experiencing are interesting - it's not like it's EXCITING. You know. EXCITING is getting a group of friends together to try out a new restaurant. EXCITING is seeing a plate of beautiful, delicious food float out from the restaurant kitchen onto your table. EXCITING is what those delicious flavors jumping around on your tongue; the textures creating a dance that is so fulfilling. That's EXCITING. EXCITING is not filling up six 20-oz. water bottles a day and setting it as your goal to drink them. EXCITING is not telling people how your gross yeast overgrowths, which you're not proud of anyway, are clearing up. EXCITING is not going out to eat with other people and watching them, in apparently good health, eat food that you know you cannot currently ingest.

So, I sit here and think - ok, do I continue this completely boring and un-exciting fast? Jesus Christ, how long will it be before I can even have a bowl of soup again? The deal is this - like I said, I think I need to keep going until I know the yeast has cleared out of me. On a water fast, since I'm not feeding it anything, I like to think that that won't take too long. So far, on the outside of me, anyway, it seems to be clearing out somewhat quickly. It just doesn't make sense to me to quit before I've killed as much of it as I can.

The fast will continue. Ugh. Seriously, it's not that it's that hard. It's just that it's so repetitive. Drink water. Drink water. Drink water. Oh! I know! Drink Water. Yippee. There's just no any variety on a water fast, you know? I did buy some Spring Water and some Purified Water, so that's my shaking it up. Want to get some distilled as well. But, for the most part, I am boringly going to continue on until I feel I have gone as long as I need to. Hope it's not boring you too much. Talk with you tomorrow.